My heart is heavy and yet I am thankful. l received word yesterday that a friend I had served with in a Relief Society Presidency in my last LDS ward in South Carolina walked in on a robbery at her own business and was killed. She was well-known in the area and was very well liked. She was truly a wonderful and lovely person. Never have I met someone with such a smiley, happy attitude; one of those genuine souls.

I am so sad for their family.

I am thankful that I knew her. I am thankful that I worked with her and was in one of the best wards in the world where we still keep in touch, still send letters and Christmas cards, still mourn with each other... I am truly thankful for those associations.

As someone who has lost both parents at an early age, I can tell you that little anecdotes about your parent's life, those little remembrances told by people that loved them or worked with them or just associated with them somehow are hugely comforting. Not just the "you'll see them again" comments which are nice but I feel are a little trite. Mainly because most Christians believe in life after death of some sort so we want to hear something more personal in these moments. 

Remember that although intellectually they may believe in eternity and life everlasting, the heart is broken and tends to rule. It's ok to cry, it's ok to be angry, it's ok to be sad. Don't try to force the healing process by saying how wonderful their reunion will be some day. We know that. It may just take a little time for that to comfort us. Just share a nice moment in time about their loved one, something that will make them proud of their family, and be a friend. And all will be well eventually.

A humbled Thanksgiving

Last night after I picked up Jon from work, we went to Moe's to have a little date night. While we talked over our "Overachiever" tacos and chips & guac and all kinds of salsas, I remarked that the parking lot at the hotel wasn't very full. He told me it was a slow day all around with the exception of a few guest issues but nothing too exciting.

And then he told me of a guest who checked in for 30 days. He said she was really nice, just a very humble type whose husband seemed very kind too. I asked what she was checking in so long for. He said that she starts her first round of chemotherapy on Thanksgiving morning and then everyday for 30 days.

My heart sank. Suddenly, my little frustrations of the week seemed so insignificant. They are. And I have no reason to complain. Everyday between kids, jobs and other responsibilities, I have a list of places to be and people to see and I do them without even thinking about any obstacles. And when there are obstacles, it's nothing that I can't work around. Nothing that would sideline me for 30 days or more anyway. And if there is something that's getting to me, I know I have my family and a couple good friends to lean on and that's all I need. Really, for me, it just boils down to that. I could list specific blessings and thoughts on thankfulness but after family and all that encompasses, it just seems less important for me to do so.

I am just thankful for the everyday with them.

Have a Happy Thanksgiving and enjoy your day!

I thought it was time for another strange situation story

A while ago someone asked why I was updating my house since I "didn't live in the right neighborhood" for that. This was a nice person but one who never thinks before they speak.

I had to do some knee-slapping laughter because it reminded me of the time when I had a church visitor over to my house once. We had just moved from Texas to another state. We decided to sock away our money so we moved into a small apartment in order to save money to buy another house. Sounds reasonable, right? My mom had been living with us for a few years by then (long story) but that is what family does and we never thought anything of it.

It never dawned on me that people would find all that odd until this visitor came by. She was trying to give a friendly, spiritual message on being thankful since it was around the Thanksgiving holiday. She was telling me what she was thankful for and I kid you not, these were her words verbatim,

"...and I'm so thankful for my family and for having a house, I mean a real house, you know, and not having to rent...you know...like yooouu." "And for being able to stay home with my kids, and for my husband who has a job that supports us, and not having to work outside of the home, like yooouu..."

I'm not sure why she held out the word but it only emphasized the fact that she was glad she wasn't me. I don't know, maybe it was a nervous thing.

I began to tune her out but heard her also say something about my mom living with me and she was thankful it wasn't her, but "like yooouu..." of course.

By this time I could tell that she realized her whole foot was in her mouth (hello!) and was trying to pull it out but doing a horrible job. She began to squirm a bit and I wondered what. in. the. world. she could possibly say next.

Then she nervously asked what I was thankful for, and swallowed hard. I literally heard her gulp. I said, "Hmmmm..." and then I heard another gulp.

A smile crept on my face.

I wondered if she could see the wheels spinning in my head or the angel and devil on each of my shoulders? Mwaahahaa...Probably.

There were all kinds of things I chuckled to myself about saying to her and they whirled around in my head and begged to bust out of my mouth.
Do I? Don't I? Ah, the moment was perfect and frankly, probably warranted, heck yeah - After all, I am only human.

But in reality, I didn't want her to worry about it because it didn't bother me that much, even though that was thee most suckiest spiritual message I have ever gotten.

So, I'm sure there was another thing she was thankful for but didn't realize: that in these situations, I ultimately decide that most people are generally good. We're just dumb sometimes so I was ok with her assessment. I knew all of the back stories, did I really care that she didn't?

After all, it was a funny evening for us. All night my mom, Jon and I kept laughing and saying things we were thankful for, like, "I'm so glad I don't suck at sports like yoouuu.." when we were out throwing the football and one of us would miss a catch. Or, "I'm so thankful I'm not a bonehead like yoouu..." when we would watch "Jeopardy" and answer incorrectly.
Or one of them would say, "I'm so thankful the baby likes me better than yoouuu.." but then when I realized she had a messy diaper, I took her to Jon and told him he was right, she does like him better and that she "only wants to be changed by yoouuu...suckah." hee hee hee...

Hugs,
Laura

Sweet Freedom

In remembrance. Jesus Hernandez. Korean War.

Memorial day signals the entrance into summer and a day off from life's grind.

All across our country, family and friends gather for picnics and cook-outs, looking forward to apple pie and homemade potato salad. Kids frolic in the afternoon air and feel the cool grass bend beneath their feet. Parents relax in their lawn chairs savoring life's sweet blessings.

And all this freedom made possible by those like-minded individuals who made the ultimate sacrifice for something bigger than themselves.

I thank you.

linking to the survey junkie